Imagine that you have your hands full, literally. There you are in your very busy life moving fast to keep it together and your hands are full holding tight on to everything that you have created. For the most part you like your life. And maybe you’d like to see just a few things be different, or perhaps you even wish something really big and important in your life was different than it is. Either way, you are so busy holding all of this together. Then sometimes in a stolen moment you might allow yourself to cast a wish out to the Universe - I wish that…And yet your life quickly jerks you back to its persistent reality that demands your attention to keep it all together.
Wow, what busy work, this keeping it all together! Consider this possibility - that all the while as you are running through each day, the very things that you don’t have yet and are wishing for deep down may very well be trying to come through for you. But guess what, they can’t get in, because you are too busy grasping at the old things and you are stuck, merely wishing that things could be different than they are now.
Homeostasis at work.
We humans are funny creatures. We get attached to things and conditions in our lives like sap to a tree. This is homeostasis at work - a property of the universe that supports a system to seek and maintain a stable condition and keep things the same. Nature experiences homeostasis of course, in order for systems and species to survive, and we humans rely on it to maintain the world we inhabit. It is a force we must be aware of if we desire to create a change in our life.
I hear from people all the time who have been trying to create something new in their life and feel discouraged when it doesn’t happen quickly enough. All discouragement is in these situations is homeostasis using your emotional system to keep you in line, to keep things they way they are. Imagine that all these elements of the life you are currently in are organized in a particular way and they are content to watch you there in the middle of it all wishing, wanting, working to make it change, frustrated that it seems that everything is resisting what you want. The resistance is not your imagination. Rather it’s the world around you simply doing its job. The world is not against you. It is not trying to create an adversarial situation to make things more challenging just for it's fun and amusement. It is just the energetic fields of "reality" holding the orbits of the people and the circumstances together in the established and familiar way.
It’s a powerful force, homeostasis, and therefore in order to create a meaningful change in your life you must influence the world around you and challenge it. You must be willing, even daring to change the ways things are. You may have to be persistent, creative, and courageous to be successful. You might be inspired by vision or perhaps frustrated by a situation. Either way you are called when creating change is what is needed. Consider the possibility that the world you are in is wanting to change and it is knocking on the door of your consciousness asking you to be the one to carry out this work.
Snap and its all different
Imagine one day it all breaks free, sometimes in a shocking way. It might even feel violent in the apparent suddenness of how it all happens. Perhaps your job is yanked out from under your feet. When you look back at it, after the initial shock has worn off you realize that you saw it coming and yet you’d gotten yourself attached and resisted responding to the early signs. Oh, those early signs. All those times that the world you are currently in whispered in your ear - hey, look around, see what else is out there, and try something different. Or all those times you tolerated some part of your life that was not working well but you were too busy or scared to address it. Instead you kept looking the other way hoping that it would work itself out somehow. And all those times you told yourself, I am too busy today but I will take care of that tomorrow…until one day it took care of you by jolting you out of an old reality that could hold no longer. When this kind of change happens it is like being caught in an earthquake. All the stored energy is released in one big jolt and everything around you that was not well secured is thrown around and broken free.
The world around us is beyond our control so any energy put towards controlling is not the best use of you. Imagine instead that at all times you are fully supported by the Universe. Imagine that there are new things that are constantly trying to come towards you and pay attention to the messages that you get. Notice the wishes and wants that occur to you. Notice the comments that are spoken to you and pay attention to what is trying to come in and to what is trying to be released.
The serenity prayer says it best:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
--Reinhold Niebuhr
What can you do?
• Look for what needs attention and tend to it like an important garden in
your life. Keep it vibrant by loving and nurturing it.
• Notice where the struggles are and ask yourself, what is going on here?
• Ask if a struggle is something that is a good use of your energy. If so then keep working it, if not then let it go cleanly and responsibly.
• When you want to create a change look at the entire system of
people and things around you and address the system as a whole.
• Be persistent with what you truly want. It is coming to you and it takes the time it takes. Not everything will move according to your schedule and many things will.
• Get help, get lots of help. Let people in, let the people around you know what it is you are trying to create and allow them to help you. They will love you for that.
• Stay flexible and open about how what you want will look and how it will happen.
• Understand that interruptions and surprises are normal and not personal, nor are they signs from the Universe - except when they are. Sometimes an interrupted or delayed idea is just the Universe saying it needs a bit more time to germinate.
• Trust your heart, appreciate your mind, and nurture your body. You will need them all.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Returned from Laos and Cambodia
I have just returned from a trip to Cambodia and Laos. I went there along with a colleague, Kyoko, to offer training to some local people. The recipients of the training were people that work with youth. It is our hope that the training supports the development of the next generation of leaders in the region.
I had fun meeting everybody and also experiencing a variety of great food. One particular dish was ants, which I would describe as crunchy and spicy.
I was last in Cambodia almost 14 years ago and it was remarkable to see the explosion of growth and development that has taken place there.
In Laos the last day of the training coincided with the beginning of their New Years festival also known as the Water Festival. During this time it seems that the only rule that applies is that everyone must get soaked and stay soaked for at least three days. The energy of the past is washed away to allow a fresh and “clean” start to the coming year.
It became a game of stealth to attempt to move around Vientiane knowing that I would be getting drenched by buckets of water thrown on by well meaning partiers while trying to save my camera from the same fate.
Even my final ride to the airport in an open tuk tuk was riding through a gauntlet of well wishers throwing water using every conceivable container they could find. There is nothing like arriving at the check in counter at the airport soaking wet from head to toe.
Many thanks to the engaged Buddhist movement and SEM (Spirit in Education Movement) and Jar, our friend and South East Asia contact who organized the trip, SRPD in Cambodia and PADETC in Laos for sponsoring us.
Sawaidee Bee Mai (Happy New Year) Everybody
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
I had fun meeting everybody and also experiencing a variety of great food. One particular dish was ants, which I would describe as crunchy and spicy.
I was last in Cambodia almost 14 years ago and it was remarkable to see the explosion of growth and development that has taken place there.
In Laos the last day of the training coincided with the beginning of their New Years festival also known as the Water Festival. During this time it seems that the only rule that applies is that everyone must get soaked and stay soaked for at least three days. The energy of the past is washed away to allow a fresh and “clean” start to the coming year.
It became a game of stealth to attempt to move around Vientiane knowing that I would be getting drenched by buckets of water thrown on by well meaning partiers while trying to save my camera from the same fate.
Even my final ride to the airport in an open tuk tuk was riding through a gauntlet of well wishers throwing water using every conceivable container they could find. There is nothing like arriving at the check in counter at the airport soaking wet from head to toe.
Many thanks to the engaged Buddhist movement and SEM (Spirit in Education Movement) and Jar, our friend and South East Asia contact who organized the trip, SRPD in Cambodia and PADETC in Laos for sponsoring us.
Sawaidee Bee Mai (Happy New Year) Everybody
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Awakened Wisdom Goes to Egypt
Hi folks,
I am happy to be able to tell you about the first offering Awakened Wisdom presented in Egypt this spring. In cooperation with BLDNA, an Egyptian NGO, our mission was to design a training that would support the BLDNA members in developing and integrating their respective leadership styles with each person’s own idea of a community project they will implement in order to raise the Egyptian society to a higher level.
I was thrilled to present the Ennea Leader Styles to these generous and courageous participants. Based on the Enneagram, the Ennea Leader Styles required each person to be willing to look not only at his or her own brilliance but also at where their styles break down and begin to work against their best intentions as community leaders.
Every person that attended took to the work whole-heartedly and the result was a brilliant experience of personal and professional development. The range of projects that is being initiated now is inspiring. These include ideas such as orphanages for children, a center for mothers, and housing for low income families to name a few.
For me it was gratifying to be able to offer the Ennea Leader Styles workshop in Egypt because this workshop is based on the Enneagram through a leadership context. It is believed that the Enneagram originated from this part of the world and so it was a particular privilege to bring it back full circle to the land of its origin.
I found everyone in attendance to be amazingly generous in energy and I was moved by the willingness of all to get real about identifying their personal work that must be taken on in order to be successful with their project. In particular I want to thank Wael Borhan who extended the invitation to Awakened Wisdom to come to Egypt for such an important assignment. Wael and his family, friends and colleagues personally took responsibility for the success of this event. Everyone was gracious towards me as I learned first hand about the high standards of generosity and hospitality of the beautiful Egyptian people.
I also want to thank Lina Nahaas from Dubai, and Mike Roberts from Germany, who came along and offered their uncompromising support to the event. Their partnership was most helpful as we managed the moment-by-moment unfolding of this three-day event. I am looking forward to returning to Egypt again and continuing the deepening of the Ennea Leader styles.
What is the Ennea Leader Styles workshop?
In short, this three-day workshop is an introduction to the nine fundamental styles of leadership as experienced through the context of the Enneagram and integrated with the Awakened Wisdom philosophy. It is a training that unlocks the mystery of how to be a great leader, by supporting everyone in identifying his or her own particular, individual leadership style. When we understand how to express our authentic leadership fully, the results we can achieve are limited only by our willingness and our imagination. And the more we understand about our styles the more our willingness and imagination is opened up to greater and greater possibilities.
If you would like to bring this powerful training to your organization or community, please contact us to discuss.
Now I am off to Cambodia and Laos to offer training there.
Journey well everyone,
I hope to see you soon,
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
I am happy to be able to tell you about the first offering Awakened Wisdom presented in Egypt this spring. In cooperation with BLDNA, an Egyptian NGO, our mission was to design a training that would support the BLDNA members in developing and integrating their respective leadership styles with each person’s own idea of a community project they will implement in order to raise the Egyptian society to a higher level.
I was thrilled to present the Ennea Leader Styles to these generous and courageous participants. Based on the Enneagram, the Ennea Leader Styles required each person to be willing to look not only at his or her own brilliance but also at where their styles break down and begin to work against their best intentions as community leaders.
Every person that attended took to the work whole-heartedly and the result was a brilliant experience of personal and professional development. The range of projects that is being initiated now is inspiring. These include ideas such as orphanages for children, a center for mothers, and housing for low income families to name a few.
For me it was gratifying to be able to offer the Ennea Leader Styles workshop in Egypt because this workshop is based on the Enneagram through a leadership context. It is believed that the Enneagram originated from this part of the world and so it was a particular privilege to bring it back full circle to the land of its origin.
I found everyone in attendance to be amazingly generous in energy and I was moved by the willingness of all to get real about identifying their personal work that must be taken on in order to be successful with their project. In particular I want to thank Wael Borhan who extended the invitation to Awakened Wisdom to come to Egypt for such an important assignment. Wael and his family, friends and colleagues personally took responsibility for the success of this event. Everyone was gracious towards me as I learned first hand about the high standards of generosity and hospitality of the beautiful Egyptian people.
I also want to thank Lina Nahaas from Dubai, and Mike Roberts from Germany, who came along and offered their uncompromising support to the event. Their partnership was most helpful as we managed the moment-by-moment unfolding of this three-day event. I am looking forward to returning to Egypt again and continuing the deepening of the Ennea Leader styles.
What is the Ennea Leader Styles workshop?
In short, this three-day workshop is an introduction to the nine fundamental styles of leadership as experienced through the context of the Enneagram and integrated with the Awakened Wisdom philosophy. It is a training that unlocks the mystery of how to be a great leader, by supporting everyone in identifying his or her own particular, individual leadership style. When we understand how to express our authentic leadership fully, the results we can achieve are limited only by our willingness and our imagination. And the more we understand about our styles the more our willingness and imagination is opened up to greater and greater possibilities.
If you would like to bring this powerful training to your organization or community, please contact us to discuss.
Now I am off to Cambodia and Laos to offer training there.
Journey well everyone,
I hope to see you soon,
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
What is it to be a great leader? What is it to be human?
There you are in the center of who you are; in a way you are trapped by all the ideas that you have made up about who you are. You are trapped by the habits that you have created, and you are trapped by a life of living from an ego structure. It is the work then, of being human, to find your way through and past all the STUFF that separates you from living your full brightness all the time.
Finding your way is not an easy task and though it is possible to find your way home while blindfolded and groping your way along in the dark it is unlikely it will work quickly or well. It is much more effective to have a structure and a system that can provide a guiding affect to support you as you journey towards being a human freed of all your “stuff.”
In the center of who you think you are is your essence. That is the light of who you are. Your essence has been there all along it is just covered in veils of behavior that bury it deep and hide it from you.
We are each on a journey to reveal that essence to ourselves and in that revealing we discover a way of being in the world that honors the magnificence of who we really are.
When we touch into that light we shine brightly on those around us and in turn the people around us are then moved to show up at their best.
That is leadership at its finest. Walking a walk that supports all those around in developing themselves as well, while you accomplish the fulfillment of your vision.
Check out our new programs that are all intended to support you in revealing the best of who you really are.
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
Finding your way is not an easy task and though it is possible to find your way home while blindfolded and groping your way along in the dark it is unlikely it will work quickly or well. It is much more effective to have a structure and a system that can provide a guiding affect to support you as you journey towards being a human freed of all your “stuff.”
In the center of who you think you are is your essence. That is the light of who you are. Your essence has been there all along it is just covered in veils of behavior that bury it deep and hide it from you.
We are each on a journey to reveal that essence to ourselves and in that revealing we discover a way of being in the world that honors the magnificence of who we really are.
When we touch into that light we shine brightly on those around us and in turn the people around us are then moved to show up at their best.
That is leadership at its finest. Walking a walk that supports all those around in developing themselves as well, while you accomplish the fulfillment of your vision.
Check out our new programs that are all intended to support you in revealing the best of who you really are.
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Economic crisis, or inevitable shift?
Wow. Can you even follow, all that is going on in the economic world news these days? Many people are asking - how do I keep my spirit up and my life moving forward when nearly every news story is threatening doom and gloom?
Let's look at some of the Awakened Wisdom principles of living an awakened life and see what they tell us.
1) From a Good State of Understanding. Consider the idea of cycles and timing. The world is taking a big economic in-breath right now. So many years of rapid growth and vigor are now being followed by a time of rebalance and correction. Many of the practices that were put in place to accelerate the world economies have now come back to bite us. I don’t hear anybody arguing the point, that it was the greed of some people inside financial institutions and the greed of the financial system itself that held the accelerator pedal down. Greed over sensibility never works out. So of course now the cycle is playing out. It is time for a correction. A primary problem with most financial systems is that they generally have short-term profit as their guiding principle; artificial acceleration of the drive for profit will inevitably lead to breakdowns. It is not sustainable.
2) A Good State of Intention has us look at what is truly important to us now. We get to use this time to realign with our deeper underlying intentions - in our jobs, in the organizations that we are running, and in our personal lives. When intention is only guided by the energy of the mind, it cannot help but lead us into trouble. Now is a time to bring some heart intelligence back into the system. Mind intelligence, when balanced with heart intelligence, will activate great creativity towards objectives that are more sustainable than those of the old system that seems now to be collapsing around us.
3) A Good State of Words. The words we choose, in the stories we tell ourselves about what is happening now, are setting up our present state of mind. When we speak to our selves, our families, our colleagues, it is important that we speak from the resourcefulness of Divine inner wisdom, rather than from uncertainty or fear. If you are feeling confronted by the current situation then certainly tell that as part of your story. But as you cast yourself as a character in your story, be sure to tell about your resilience and your creativity and how you are finding a way through this time. The media, driven by profits, is telling plenty of dreadful stories that permeate and influence our state of mind. Be discerning about what stories you are listening to. Seek balanced views.
4) A Good State of Being reminds us to look into the relationships of our life including the relationship that we have with our self, our families, and our colleagues. At the end of the day, it’s how you’ve been in these relationships that really matters. For many it is a time to slow down as the storms pass by, to nurture your physical well-being. A good physical well-being will support your emotional being as well. If you are experiencing anger or fear about what is going on in the world at this time, first notice that then ground yourself in your Divine inner wisdom. Spending time in away from the fray, in nature if possible, is one of the most powerful ways to do that.
5) A Good State of Purpose reminds us to look deeper into why we are chasing whatever it is that has us so compelled at the moment. Every now and then we get completely distracted, chasing after a ball that no longer serves us. Step out of the chase for a moment and look again at what is truly important now. What is worthy of your attention according to your heart wisdom?
6) A Good State of Effort. Notice what doors ARE opening now. Trust, and walk through them with ease and delight. In challenging times it is especially important to keep breathing easy and move according to the current of the river in which you find yourself. Sometimes it is time to row harder (though still with ease and delight) and sometimes it is time to pull your paddle out of the water and coast a bit. Relax and consider - what is the right amount of effort for you at this time?
7) A Good State of Practice. When the world around us is shaking, it is easy to put aside your daily practices. Yet this is the most important time to maintain them. Look into your physical practice and take care of your body. What spiritual practice is needed now? This is a good time to practice daily appreciations for whatever you DO have that is truly important in your life right now.
8) A Good State of Doing. Staying engaged in the action of your life is important. Compare the amount of action you’ve been taking with the situation you are now in. As the Northern hemisphere moves towards winter it is time to prepare to slow down for a while. We humans were never meant to run full out forever. Perhaps this is a time to embrace slowing down, finding a different pace that is congruent with the ebb in which we may now find ourselves.
It is easy to move through good times and enjoy life. In challenging times we find out who we really are. This is a good time to notice the wisdom of your heart and to clean up your house of old priorities that no longer fit or serve you.
Even the world economic systems are not immune from this wisdom.
Be well,
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
Let's look at some of the Awakened Wisdom principles of living an awakened life and see what they tell us.
1) From a Good State of Understanding. Consider the idea of cycles and timing. The world is taking a big economic in-breath right now. So many years of rapid growth and vigor are now being followed by a time of rebalance and correction. Many of the practices that were put in place to accelerate the world economies have now come back to bite us. I don’t hear anybody arguing the point, that it was the greed of some people inside financial institutions and the greed of the financial system itself that held the accelerator pedal down. Greed over sensibility never works out. So of course now the cycle is playing out. It is time for a correction. A primary problem with most financial systems is that they generally have short-term profit as their guiding principle; artificial acceleration of the drive for profit will inevitably lead to breakdowns. It is not sustainable.
2) A Good State of Intention has us look at what is truly important to us now. We get to use this time to realign with our deeper underlying intentions - in our jobs, in the organizations that we are running, and in our personal lives. When intention is only guided by the energy of the mind, it cannot help but lead us into trouble. Now is a time to bring some heart intelligence back into the system. Mind intelligence, when balanced with heart intelligence, will activate great creativity towards objectives that are more sustainable than those of the old system that seems now to be collapsing around us.
3) A Good State of Words. The words we choose, in the stories we tell ourselves about what is happening now, are setting up our present state of mind. When we speak to our selves, our families, our colleagues, it is important that we speak from the resourcefulness of Divine inner wisdom, rather than from uncertainty or fear. If you are feeling confronted by the current situation then certainly tell that as part of your story. But as you cast yourself as a character in your story, be sure to tell about your resilience and your creativity and how you are finding a way through this time. The media, driven by profits, is telling plenty of dreadful stories that permeate and influence our state of mind. Be discerning about what stories you are listening to. Seek balanced views.
4) A Good State of Being reminds us to look into the relationships of our life including the relationship that we have with our self, our families, and our colleagues. At the end of the day, it’s how you’ve been in these relationships that really matters. For many it is a time to slow down as the storms pass by, to nurture your physical well-being. A good physical well-being will support your emotional being as well. If you are experiencing anger or fear about what is going on in the world at this time, first notice that then ground yourself in your Divine inner wisdom. Spending time in away from the fray, in nature if possible, is one of the most powerful ways to do that.
5) A Good State of Purpose reminds us to look deeper into why we are chasing whatever it is that has us so compelled at the moment. Every now and then we get completely distracted, chasing after a ball that no longer serves us. Step out of the chase for a moment and look again at what is truly important now. What is worthy of your attention according to your heart wisdom?
6) A Good State of Effort. Notice what doors ARE opening now. Trust, and walk through them with ease and delight. In challenging times it is especially important to keep breathing easy and move according to the current of the river in which you find yourself. Sometimes it is time to row harder (though still with ease and delight) and sometimes it is time to pull your paddle out of the water and coast a bit. Relax and consider - what is the right amount of effort for you at this time?
7) A Good State of Practice. When the world around us is shaking, it is easy to put aside your daily practices. Yet this is the most important time to maintain them. Look into your physical practice and take care of your body. What spiritual practice is needed now? This is a good time to practice daily appreciations for whatever you DO have that is truly important in your life right now.
8) A Good State of Doing. Staying engaged in the action of your life is important. Compare the amount of action you’ve been taking with the situation you are now in. As the Northern hemisphere moves towards winter it is time to prepare to slow down for a while. We humans were never meant to run full out forever. Perhaps this is a time to embrace slowing down, finding a different pace that is congruent with the ebb in which we may now find ourselves.
It is easy to move through good times and enjoy life. In challenging times we find out who we really are. This is a good time to notice the wisdom of your heart and to clean up your house of old priorities that no longer fit or serve you.
Even the world economic systems are not immune from this wisdom.
Be well,
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
Friday, December 7, 2007
Something is trying to happen in your organization?
Something is trying to happen in your organization?
Lets start off with a couple of assumptions. Even though the old saying about assumptions suggests that I am already in trouble for having them I will hold out for the "truth" of these:
1) Your organization is filled with some very smart and creative people.
2) They know something important is needed, it is related to what is next.
3) This something is stirring below the surface and is felt as much as it is consciously known.
As the people in your organization work in the system of it they are tuned in to a collective wisdom. That wisdom is experienced as a hunch or a knowing that eventually will be revealed as the next great idea for a much needed process or a product. It may be the answer to your organizations next big challenge. It also may be that this idea could get left behind on the table for a variety of preventable reasons.
You likely don't need one more consultant to come in and tell you what to do. No one can know better than the people that are living and breathing inside your team.
It is more likely that the solutions are known at some level and if only you all had more time to explore, to reveal, to tell someone and of course to listen.
It seems counter intuitive perhaps that the key to moving forward in a good way may be in your willingness to slow down, do less, and to reflect or imagine more. You may be thinking that everyone is so busy how could you possible justify taking a day off just to chat, to consider, to celebrate, to huddle and most important to breathe and yet how can you not?
Take a walk each day in nature. You will be amazed at how much more you will get done and you will have a better experience doing it.
Take your team for a visioning day and reveal that solution that is right beneath the surface.
Bring in a coach to run it and free yourself to participate and to listen.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Great leaders and great relationships
Many people in organizations get ahead because they are very skilled and they accomplish important goals on behalf of the organization they work in.
For the most part these people found a good way for them to be used by the organization, they excelled, and conversely the organization found someone that could contribute exactly what was needed.
All to often though these very same people are not naturally skilled at leading the people around them in a good way. They get the results but they have an unintended impact on the people around them that is not optimum for everybody's highest performance.
This generally results in people feeling misunderstood or worse yet feeling used in a negative way by that "successful" person. Quite often the organization itself decides to ignore or turn a blind eye to that successful persons behavior because they don't want to risk rocking the boat.
Instead they expect the people around that one to put up with behavior that is ultimately not serving anyone including that high performer.
What is interesting about this is that the high performer would most often prefer to have better relationships and they are challenged very often by two big factors.
1) They feel they are too busy to "deal" with it.
2) They don't know how and are often scared of the perceived fallout of addressing what is not working.
When I am coaching someone in this situation I almost always hear from them, a strong desire to be a better leader. These top performers want to be better at creating powerful and respectful relationships and they do want to learn more about how to do it.
They are almost always challenged by the pressure of heavy workloads and it is very difficult for them to create a shift in their own behavior if their personal work is not supported by the team also doing it's share.
Or, quite often they are unaware of what is going on. They don't even know that they are leaving a trail of disempowered or disgruntled people behind them.
I believe that the performance of any individual and the team as a whole is directly proportional to the quality of the relationships that person or group is in.
This is where coaching can be so effective. A good coach can bring everyone together and guide the team members through a process that clears the air, reconnects everyone to the vision and values that they share, and then support them as they create some agreements that can help sustain the benefit of such essential work.
It is natural that relationships eventually get clogged up with unaired stuff. Usually this results in very ineffective performance and ironically the fear of addressing the stuff is usually much bigger than what it actually takes to clear it.
None of us would argue that we need to clean out water pipes that have accumulated stuff inside them and yet it usually takes a breakdown in a team before clearing takes place.
Imagine if clearing the stuff, and realigning visions and strategies was just a normal part of a years work.
Imagine if the energy between team members was always tended to and cared for and that breakdowns were recognized as opportunities for breakthroughs.
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
For the most part these people found a good way for them to be used by the organization, they excelled, and conversely the organization found someone that could contribute exactly what was needed.
All to often though these very same people are not naturally skilled at leading the people around them in a good way. They get the results but they have an unintended impact on the people around them that is not optimum for everybody's highest performance.
This generally results in people feeling misunderstood or worse yet feeling used in a negative way by that "successful" person. Quite often the organization itself decides to ignore or turn a blind eye to that successful persons behavior because they don't want to risk rocking the boat.
Instead they expect the people around that one to put up with behavior that is ultimately not serving anyone including that high performer.
What is interesting about this is that the high performer would most often prefer to have better relationships and they are challenged very often by two big factors.
1) They feel they are too busy to "deal" with it.
2) They don't know how and are often scared of the perceived fallout of addressing what is not working.
When I am coaching someone in this situation I almost always hear from them, a strong desire to be a better leader. These top performers want to be better at creating powerful and respectful relationships and they do want to learn more about how to do it.
They are almost always challenged by the pressure of heavy workloads and it is very difficult for them to create a shift in their own behavior if their personal work is not supported by the team also doing it's share.
Or, quite often they are unaware of what is going on. They don't even know that they are leaving a trail of disempowered or disgruntled people behind them.
I believe that the performance of any individual and the team as a whole is directly proportional to the quality of the relationships that person or group is in.
This is where coaching can be so effective. A good coach can bring everyone together and guide the team members through a process that clears the air, reconnects everyone to the vision and values that they share, and then support them as they create some agreements that can help sustain the benefit of such essential work.
It is natural that relationships eventually get clogged up with unaired stuff. Usually this results in very ineffective performance and ironically the fear of addressing the stuff is usually much bigger than what it actually takes to clear it.
None of us would argue that we need to clean out water pipes that have accumulated stuff inside them and yet it usually takes a breakdown in a team before clearing takes place.
Imagine if clearing the stuff, and realigning visions and strategies was just a normal part of a years work.
Imagine if the energy between team members was always tended to and cared for and that breakdowns were recognized as opportunities for breakthroughs.
Patrick Ryan
www.AwakenedWisdom.com
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